As a divorce lawyer, I always want to know everything good or bad and even if it is not totally true, I really need to know what the other side will say about you. To be honest, the bad stuff is rarely as bad as people think and it is always better to be informed than to be surprised. If you think your spouse has seen an attorney, let your layer know that as well.
Bring every bit of financial information you can find. Pay stubs and tax returns are vital. The attorney needs to know what you will be interested in fighting for and what you care about Try not to get bogged down in who gets the toaster, but think about the house, the retirement funds, the cars and the big stuff. Bring information about your debts as well. Organized is better if possible
If you have kids, that should be the focus. Begin to think about parenting time and decision making. Also think about who may be able to testify about your parenting and that of your spouse.
You also need to be ready to ask about the lawyer's qualifications and whether this is the right one for you. Does he specialize in family law? How often does she practice in the Court you will file in? Does he settle more cases or try more? What experts does he expect to use? Does she return phone calls? Also ask about billing and costs, as these cases can get expensive.
Your divorce lawyer will end up knowing more about you than your mother, so you need to be very comfortable with him or her. If not, look for another one. Good luck, this is always hard.
If you BOTH agree to a mediator, then that is a possibility. A lawyer won't be granted to you in a civil matter. The child will be granted a lawyer. (a guardian-lit em) to look out for the child's best interests. If the judge granted the emergency hearing, there must be something a little out of whack. Your best best is going through the mediator and working something out with the child's father. Judges can be harsh.